Robert J. Simons

It is with great sadness that we announce the loss of our favorite comedian, coach, and mentor on the morning of Thursday, July 13, 2023. He passed peacefully surrounded by his wife, his children, and their partners, all of whom are grateful to have shared with him the loving final moments he deserved.

Robert “Bob” Simons was born at home in Philadelphia on January 14, 1944, to Henry and Elizabeth Simmons. (The extra “m” is for the “mystery” of why everyone in his family had a different last name.) He was a proud son of Port Richmond, a predominantly Polish Philadelphia neighborhood, where he grew up with his older brother Joey and his younger sister Donna. Nicknamed Froggy by his friends, he excelled in sports, causing trouble, and charming his way out of various scrapes.

He attended Nativity BVM grade school and then graced both North Catholic and Frankford High Schools with his presence, never quite being able to see the vision each school had for him. After a mutual parting of the ways with Frankford High, he enrolled in The University of Vietnam, by way of the United States Air Force. Although his official title was “Personnel Specialist”, Bob discovered a knack for entrepreneurship and sales, creating a bustling side business purveying fine spirits and tobacco to other young Americans who came to his desk for their paychecks and rarely left with the full amount.

Upon his return home, he worked for multiple companies in the logistics and distribution industry. In 1982 he was offered a sales job at Hickman Williams & Company, although the company only agreed to hire him on commission. Bob spent the rest of his career at Hickman Williams, first making the company deeply regret the “commission only” offer, then enjoying an upward trajectory that ultimately led him to the top of the company, as Vice President and a member of the Board of Directors.

Throughout his life, Bob loved a deal and he never closed one more meaningful than when he convinced Sandra Lorimer to marry him after only three months of dating in 1970. They spent their 51-year marriage raising their two children, Carrie and Bobby, and building a community of neighborhood friends that joined each other in celebrating life’s happiest moments and sustained each other through its lower ones. Later in life, Bob and Sandy would travel the world as retirees, visiting places that young Froggy could never have imagined. He also enjoyed spending time with his sister Donna and brother-in-law Jeff at the Shore, as well as attending a relentless number of Lorimer family events that Bob was never successfully able to avoid or leave early.

Bob enjoyed a “Hall of Fame career” (his words) for the Bebo’s Tavern softball team in his 20’s and 30’s, manning the hot corner. Bob was also an avid golfer, a legendary (again, his words) soccer coach for St. Charles Borromeo CYO, and a fan of all Philadelphia sports teams. He used these experiences to teach his children about the aspects of sports and life that made the biggest difference. He believed in the basics: moving without the ball, manufacturing runs, using the run to set up the pass, and playing the bump and run as opposed to the flashy flop shot. Some of his greatest memories were made at Bensalem Country Club, playing in Friday night scrambles and many different tournaments where he vigorously maintained that he never got enough shots. His son Bobby will miss their Father/Son golf trips, although Bob always claimed he was trying to hurt him with early tee times in order to play 36!

Following his retirement in 2008, Bob enjoyed four years of peace prior to the arrival of his most treasured (and loud) gifts … the births of his granddaughters Vivian and Violet. Poppy, as he came to be known, thrived in this newfound position. Always ready to flag down the ice cream man, have a tea party in the backyard, or spin the end of a jump rope, it was clear that no other kind of success he’d enjoyed was as meaningful to him as the love he shared with these girls. The addition of his bonus grandkids Cecilia and Finnegan a few years later only confirmed that Poppy had been waiting for this role all his life.

Poppy is survived by his wife of 51 years Sandy (nee Lorimer), daughter Carrie (Marc Lindsay), son Bobby (Caitlin Kline), granddaughters Vivian and Violet Simons (as well as their mother Sara), and Cecilia and Finnegan Lindsay, and his sister Donna Piekarski (Jeff). In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations to First Tee, an organization that empowers kids and teens to be the best version of themselves through golf, or to a local youth sports organization of your choice. Bob requests that you order a big glass of wine and a large ice cream, smoke a cigar, give the people you love a little bit of a hard time, and think about how “life is good.”

Relatives and friends are invited to attend his Viewing at the Tomlinson Funeral Home, 2207 Bristol Pike, Bensalem, PA 19020 on Friday, July 21st from 9:30-11:00 AM followed by his Service at 11:00 AM. Interment will be private.